Deepika Padukone says ‘I was Suicidal at times’

Deepika Padukone who opened up about her battle with depression in 2014, has often shared her struggle to overcome overwhelming thoughts.

During a recent event in Mumbai, she recalled how she overcame depression with the help of medical professionals and support from her family.

The Tamasha star said that she even “felt suicidal at times,” reported news agency ANI.

Thanking her mom Ujjala Padukone, Deepika said: “I give all the credit to my mother for recognising the signs and symptoms because it just happened out of the blue.”

She added: “I was on a career-high, and everything was going well, so there was no reason or no apparent reason why I should’ve felt the way I was feeling, but I would break down for no reason.

“There were days when I just didn’t want to wake up, I would sleep because sleep for me was an escape, I was suicidal at times.”

Recalling her ordeal with depression, Deepika said at the event: “My parents live in Bengaluru and every time they visited me, even now when they visit me, I always put on a brave front, like everything’s okay, you know you always want to show your parents that you’re fine.”

“So, I was doing one of those things like I’m fine… until they were leaving one day, they were going back to Bengaluru and I broke down and my mother asked me the usual hygiene questions like… is it a boyfriend?

“Is it someone at work? Has something happened? And I just didn’t have answers… it was none of these things. And it just came from an empty, hollow place. And she knew instantly, and I think that for me was God sent.”

Speaking of how medication helped her get better, Deepika added: “Coming back to me… I needed professional help.

“And then the journey went on. I was put on to a psychiatrist, medication which went back and forth for many months.

“I was resistant to that at first because there was so much stigma attached to mental illness, so that went on for a couple of months until I finally started taking medication and started feeling better.”

Earlier during an appearance on Kaun Banega Crorepati 13, Deepika Padukone opened up to Amitabh Bachchan saying: “I was diagnosed with depression in 2014. I used to feel weird that people don’t talk about it.

“It was a stigma and people don’t even know much about it.”

“During that time, I realised that if I am experiencing this, then there would be many people out there facing depression as well.

“My ambition in life was that if I could save just one life, then my purpose was solved. We have come a long way now.”