"an outpouring of work and stories and paintings and feelings"
Nitin Ganatra explained how he used his love for painting to help him cope with depression.
The former EastEnders actor revealed the Covid-19 lockdown triggered a depression so deep it was almost like paralysis.
He said he used to find solace from “daily violence and racism” in drawing.
Nitin has now hosted his first exhibition.
Recalling his childhood, Nitin said he was beaten up on his way to and from school. Even teachers used racist expressions and names.
He said: “I literally shut down and focused on a piece of paper with a pen – pens were cheaper than pencils at the time.
“I would draw and paint relentlessly as a coping strategy.”
He used this same strategy during lockdown.
Nitin Ganatra continued: “It was an outpouring of work and stories and paintings and feelings and emotions.
“I would do a painting, finish it, put it in a box.
“But then I posted one on social media, and another and the reaction started to grow.
“And then suddenly it became a reality that I could possibly start being the person that I wanted to be.
“Going back to painting was like falling in love with the younger me again.”
Nitin described painting as his “first love” and he revealed that when he was 17, he was on his way to a university interview when he sat near an art dealer who looked at his portfolio.
His hopes were dashed as the art dealer told him: “You’re never going to make it.”
Nitin added: “It broke me, so I decided to become an actor instead.”
He went on to star in EastEnders for nine years, playing Masood Ahmed. Nina Wadia played his onscreen wife Zainab.
Nitin Ganatra believed it was “brave” to introduce a Muslim family to the soap.
He stated that he and Nina took the opportunity to play a couple who were not stereotypical.
Nitin said: “What we didn’t want, as actors, was to play safe.
“We were a lot more hands-on, we were very physically affectionate with each other, we were very naughty and a bit randy, you know.
“It seemed to open the doors – it didn’t have to be conservative.”
“And I think because we played with the drama and comedy of it, people warmed to us.”
On whether he will return to EastEnders, Nitin teased:
“I get asked this every day, but as far as I know, but not as far as I know. I haven’t had that phone call yet.
“But – never say never. I’ll take my canvas with me.”
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