"he asked if I was gonna be a virgin for eternity."
Sonali Chandra has revealed that her dates ‘ghost’ her when they discover she is a 36-year-old virgin.
The US-born business manager and stand-up comedian was raised in a very conservative household where she was taught sex is a sacred act between husband and wife.
But now even her family are telling her to “just do it already”.
Sonali remains committed and says she will only sleep with a man who “puts a ring on it”.
This makes modern dating difficult, with many men ‘ghosting’ her once they realise she has never had sex.
Sonali explained: “The first time I ever told a guy that I’m still a virgin was when I was 26.
“The guy who was my first kiss, my first actual relationship, he was shocked. His jaw dropped and he asked if I was gonna be a virgin for eternity.”
Sonali spent her 27th birthday wondering if her boyfriend was going to message her back before realising she had been ghosted on her birthday.
This was the first of many disappearing boyfriends.
Sonali said: “Whenever these guys have ghosted me I have gone through emotional hell.
“It’s heart-wrenching and makes me think that guys only think I’m good for sex.”
Sonali previously revealed she had been in three serious relationships but has dated nine men in total, with each one “turning into a jerk” when stood firm on the sex issue.
She said: “I consider sex sacred and special.
“In fact, I don’t even like the word ‘sex’, I prefer ‘making love’. I’ll be ready [to make love] when I have a ring from ‘the one’.”
As a child, Sonali grew up in a strict household.
Her parents, both from India, did not allow her to have any sleepovers and dating was off the table.
Sonali was not even allowed to go to prom and when it came time for university, she could not live in a dorm.
She said: “My strict upbringing absolutely has had a profound impact on my dating life. I was not allowed to socialise and dating was a big no-no.
“Dating is a life skill, and I was forbidden from developing that skill in my teenage and college years.”
Sonali’s sexuality has also been questioned, with suitors assuming she is a lesbian or asexual when she turns down their advances.
“The truth is, I am a heterosexual female. I have strong values and high morals and I consider sex sacred and special.”
Sonali also revealed some of her fears around pre-marital sex, including becoming pregnant.
She argued: “The biggest concern for me was getting accidentally pregnant.
“It’s so easy for men. It’s an easy in and out, right?
“For us women, it’s, it’s a long process. There’s so many health issues, STDs, UTI, getting accidentally pregnant, even if they’re on the pill.
“Celibacy means I don’t have to deal with all that stuff.”
Sonali wants a man to want her for her, not because they are trying to break her virginity pledge.
And despite finding conventional dating methods difficult to navigate, Sonali refuses to have an arranged marriage.
“I don’t want my parents deciding who I have sex with, ew, we don’t talk about that stuff.”