"it was like they’d almost seen a ghost."
A Birmingham man with a facial disfigurement revealed he was recently refused service at a London café and still faces daily abuse and stares because of his face.
Amit Ghose was born with Neurofibromatosis type 1, a genetic condition that causes non-cancerous tumours to form along nerves.
The condition has affected his facial appearance since childhood, leading to severe bullying and social exclusion.
Subjected to brutal bullying as a child, Amit Ghose says he still has to deal with constant staring, pointing and comments, and has even been refused service in a café because of his face.
He said the incident happened during a recent visit to an independent coffee shop in London.
Amit recalled: “Everyone was staring at me, and it was like they’d almost seen a ghost.
“The person serving looked at me and said: ‘Oh, we’re not serving any more’. She turned around and walked off. But clearly, clearly they were still serving.”
The experience is just one of many he has faced.
Amit had his left eye surgically removed at age 11. He said this caused additional facial disfigurement and worsened the bullying he received at school.
He said: “In the run up to Halloween one year, a child at school told me ‘you don’t need a Halloween mask, you’ve got one for life’.
“That broke me to the point where I did not accept the left hand side of my face.
“For a very, very long time, I hid the face, I just was not comfortable showing it to the world at all.”
He said many people failed to grasp the psychological impact of his childhood experiences.
“Other children not wanting to come and sit next to me or hiding behind their parents all had a mental effect on me.”
Despite this, Amit found some solace in sport.
“Cricket helped me become Amit, that boy who plays cricket, from Amit, the boy who has a funny face.”
But the stares did not stop once he reached adulthood:
“The pointing, the tapping, the friend next to them saying ‘have you seen that guy’s face’, that is also constant.
“But there is kindness out there as well, and that needs highlighting.”
He credits his wife, Piyali, with helping him learn to accept himself.
“She taught me the art of acceptance. Really that I’ve got to accept myself before others can accept me.”
It was Piyali who persuaded him to share his story on social media:
“I thought TikTok was all about singing and dancing, and I thought maybe not, but she convinced me.
“I created a video and I said to the world: ‘I want to take you all on a journey to help and support and inspire you using my lived experiences’.”
Amit started his account in early 2023. Since then, he has gained nearly 200,000 followers and millions of likes.
“Me helping people on social media by sharing my story has helped me become more accepting of myself.
“Now I say to the world, this is me, take it or leave it.”
He left his law firm job in 2024 to focus on motivational speaking full-time because helping people felt far more important, he said.
Amit now delivers talks in schools across the UK to encourage children to “embrace their personalities and celebrate who they are”.
His experiences of discrimination also inspired him to self-publish a children’s book titled Born Different.
Amit explained: “I had a couple of individuals come over to me in a park and ask me what happened to my face, and I thought they were just being curious.
“But actually they started laughing, giggling, saying: ‘Oh my God, if I had a face like you I wouldn’t even come out my house’.”
He said the abuse “really upset” him.
“And I thought to myself, I need to do something about this. I need to get this book out. Now is the right time.”
“If I had this book when I was a young child, I think it would have helped me.”
Amit is also launching a podcast aimed at spotlighting the lives of others with visible differences.
Among his first guests will be Oliver Bromley, who made headlines after he was ejected from a restaurant because staff said he was “scaring the customers”.
Amit added: “We’re going to have lots of fun and inspire a lot of people.
“Disability or no disability, visible difference or no visible difference, we all have insecurities, we all have things that we’re faced with, and challenges we’re faced with.
“I just want to give this narrative to people that if we truly celebrate who we are, accept who we are, fall in love with who we are, then we can be more confident.”
Watch DESIblitz’s Interview with Amit Ghose
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