Sex Help: What are the Best Ways to Satisfy my Girlfriend?

When aiming to satisfy your girlfriend there are some important things to know. Our sexpert Rima Hawkins reveals five of them.

Satisfy my Girlfriend

What are the Best Ways to Satisfy my Girlfriend?

Not all women are the same. Sexual satisfaction or gratification is a very personal thing. What satisfies one person may not satisfy another so one cannot use past experience to know exactly what are the best ways to satisfy the girlfriend at that time.

To feel content or satisfied both partners need to take responsibility not only to find out what turns her on but also to explore and know exactly what turns you on. Knowing what turns you on gives you confidence in guiding the partner.

If you focus on yourself and ask for what you need or want it will give her space and permission to request what she wants. This then creates a healthy informed intimacy.

However, sometimes just focusing on yourself may not feel engaging for the partner. Knowing your partner’s expectation will help you to satisfy her needs and make her happy. You also need to know what she dislikes and why.

You can do all of this by talking, which includes joking on a sensitive and embarrassing topic.

When you initiate sex, take your time to foreplay, ask what she thinks, feel when you touch various parts of her body what feels erogenous and what is a turn-off.

You will learn to know what to avoid and what to do more of, as you do it more. Remember learning about your girlfriend is what helps develop a stronger bond and relationship sexually.

So here are the top 5 ways most women feel satisfied:

1. Get to know her body and mind, use all five senses to work her out – touching the breasts and other parts of the body, smell, hear (noises that she likes or dislikes), talking dirty, seeing things that turn each other on, taste each other (kissing).

2. ‘Turning on’ happens two ways; either by touching or sensing arousal in erogenous zones or by the brain sending messages to parts of the body which in turn signals desire. Take time to undress, surprise her with what she likes. Find out if she likes it rough (gentle pull on the hair) or gentle (nibbling the neck). Make sure you do what she likes. Tell her if you think differently and what turns you on.

3. Does she like to lead or to be led? Bring confidence to her where you don’t mind her leading you. Check her mood.

Find out if she wants to explore different positions during foreplay, kissing during sex and play heavily on the sensuousness not hurrying the ultimate.

4. Don’t rush, take it slow, know how she plays and what she wants to play with. Delay her arousal, when she’s had enough and can’t bear it anymore make her asks to bring her to climax. Tease to please.

5. Finally, allow both of you to have the pleasure of pleasuring each other. Be present in the moment and after climax continue to hold/hug, caress, kiss and have the intimacy until you are relaxed to let each other go.

Remember that each person is different and the ways to satisfy you girlfriend best, is to get to know as much as possible but also keeping an element of surprise and teasing during sex. Have fun!

Rima Hawkins is a professionally trained Sex and Relationship therapist for individuals and couples working privately in London. Rima has worked in the NHS for 24 years and is a Relate Therapist. Information about her services is available on her website.

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Rima Hawkins is a practising London-based British-Asian bilingual Sex and Relationship Therapist with a special interest in intercultural relationships and female sexual issues. Her motto: 'Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love.' ~ Woody Allen