"I cannot have that conversation with my mum and dad ever."
Nadiya Hussain shared a harrowing account of being sexually abused by a cousin at the age of five.
Speaking on the We Need To Talk podcast with host Paul C Brunson, The Great British Bake Off winner gave a heart-wrenching insight into her childhood.
Nadiya explained: “As a five-year-old, I was sexually abused by my own cousin and I didn’t really know that that was sexual abuse until I was in my biology lesson in year eight and we were having a sex education class.
“And the penny dropped. I put the two together and I was like, that happened to me – and then I just… I remember vomiting profusely and my teacher said, ‘Are you unwell?’ And I said, ‘No, I’m fine’.
“And that was it. Didn’t tell the teacher, didn’t say anything, just quietly… because this was a cousin that I was around all the time.
“He was there all the time, and he was in our house and he was upstairs, and he was everywhere.”
When asked about her family’s reaction, Nadiya revealed the painful silence that has shrouded the abuse.
“We don’t talk about it. Nobody talks about it. Nobody.
“But my sisters. I talk with my sisters.
“I can sit here and tell the whole world, but I cannot have that conversation with my mum and dad ever.”
Elaborating on her reluctance to speak to her parents, she continued:
“Would I like to… if they were different people, yeah. I know them too well, I know that, I know what I’d be met with.
“I live in a community where the men are protected. And to be fair, we live in a society where men are always protected.”
Nadiya Hussain expressed her fear of being blamed for the abuse, a fear that has kept her silent within her family.
“And I don’t want anyone to say that it was my fault, because I think that’s what I’m going to hear.
“And I think I don’t want to hear that. If I hear that, I lose it and I don’t want to hear that.
“What I would hate to see is… I feel like I would be blamed and he would be protected, and I just can’t dig that up.”
Nadiya wrote about the sexual abuse in her 2019 memoir Finding My Voice and its connection to her PTSD struggles.
Nadiya Hussain also highlighted the racism she has faced growing up:
“The first time I ever experienced racism was the day the Twin Towers came down.
“I was in college, I was 18, I was walking home and two white men stopped their van, parked up, screeched to a halt, came out, spat in my face and drove off, and I cried all the way home and I had no idea what happened.”
She revealed that her own children have experienced more racism at a younger age than she did:
“My kids have experienced more racism at a younger age because, you know, they’ve been called terrorists and they’ll wear their Friday robes for Friday prayer.”
Loading ...